Archive for August, 2007

I am proud!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on August 31, 2007 by Budd Black

Last night was first grade open house for the parents.  The kids have been in school for about 3 weeks.  Oddly, in my daughters class of 20, only 3 other parents showed up.  While the teacher was giving her chapel, I was reading over what they would learn this year.  My mind immediately went to dread as I recognized that Ashli knows almost everything on the list.  I stuck around to talk to the teacher about the behavior chart (Ashli has been getting yellows instead of greens) and the teacher wanted to talk to me as well.  She said not to worry about the yellows as it is a five color system and those are just warnings for things like talking an so forth.  She then told me that Ashli is reading at a 3rd grade level.  As the school is only K-1 the classroom and the library are not really stocked with books to challenge her.  She said she was going to go borrow books from the other school and that Ashli was going to start the Accelerated Reader program immediatly instead of after winter break with everyone else.  I was trying to hold back beeming with pride, but I think it is great.  They are also going to test her for the gifted program.  We are still going to work with her on reading but I think we should concetrate on other subjects to let her advance in those as well.

I don't mean to brag on my child, but yes I do.

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I May Have Watched Some Movies

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on August 30, 2007 by Budd Black

This is one of those times that they mistake geeks with people that are retarded or psychotic.  It makes the movie less funny.  Jon Lovitz character was the best and his estate was awesome and made the entire movie worth it.  The movie is filled with potty humor and hardly kept my attention. 

 

This movie was better than I thought it would be.  Still not all that great, but better than I thought.  It really attacks some of the problems with gymnastic scoring.  I don't really know these problems because I stopped watching gymnastics when it became illegal for me to think the girls were hot. 

 

Think Top Gun only in the Navy.   Wait. . . at Annapolis.  actually you have to mix in Rocky, Taps, and any movie about basic training.   It wasn't really that good but it wasn't absolutely horrible either.  It was as entertaining as the previous two I guess. 

 

This movie was great and I hate the Eagles.  Marky Mark continues to suprise me with his acting ability.  He is able to play "everyman" better than almost anyone else in hollywood.  The movie is loosly based on the real life of Vince Papolli.  It is of course one of those disney sports movies that falls in line with miracle and the rookie, but I liked those movies too.

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QotD: My Best Friend

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on August 30, 2007 by Budd Black

What makes your best friend so special? 
Submitted by Jessmiloo.

 

Well, my best friend is Miss Teen South Carolina.  And as we all know by now, she is a little special.  I think the thing that makes her so special is pretty obvious (it is rude to talk about peoples disabilities you know). 

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Exclusive Interview

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , on August 29, 2007 by Budd Black

Larry Craig, Senator for the state of Idaho (and I da pimp), sat down with me recently to discuss the controversy surrounding him and GOP policies. 

Alternate Realities (AR):  So senator, are you gay?

Larry Craig (LC):  No, I am not gay.  I have a wife and kids.  Do gay people have wives and kids? No!

AR:  How do you explain what took place in the restroom and with that one guy and the several other people that have come forward to mention your tendencies in that direction?

LC:  Come on, I am a guy.  We want to get lucky.  If we are horny or drunk enough, we don't care who.  Just because someone smokes when they are drinking, we don't call that person a smoker.

AR:  So you were drunk then senator, when this happened?

LC:  I didn't say that.

AR:  Given your recent experiences and the experiences of some of your "conservative" bed fellows, how does the right justify their ban on gay marriage.

LC:  You have to realize that we can only get elected if we represent conservative values.  We are rich and immoral, so of course that isn't going to happen. We learn early on to hide our true selves completely and to become exactly what the poles say we should become.  The conservatives were under represented and I made myself represent them.  This has been happening for years.  The ban on gay marriage is too fold.  You see, we false conservatives have to live our true lives in the closet.  We can still do what we want, but we have to be covert.  For most of us that is just taking bribes, sniffing coke, and abandoning our military service, but to a few it means homosexual sex.  Bathroom encounters at the park, airport, and rest stops are the only way that we could have intimate anonymous encounters.  Gay marriage, and to a larger extent the acceptance of the gay life style, has made these encounters harder to find. 

AR:  So you want to ban gay marriage to increase bathroom encounters.

LC:  I didn't say that, I am not gay. 

AR:  Are the reports of the glory holes in the bathroom stalls on capital hill true?

LC:  No!  Everytime we get a good size whole started, they patch it up. . . I mean. . . I am not gay.

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Accused!

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on August 28, 2007 by Budd Black

About a year and a half ago I was really into Blogger/Blogspot.  I sent out some invitations to some of my real world friends so they could get in on the fun.  About 3-4 months ago, I was invited to Linked In.  I thought it was a great resource and again invited some people I thought might be interested. 

One of the people that received both of these invitations, we will call her Meredeth, started getting spammed on her work email about 2 weeks ago.  Of course I used the only email i knew for her, her work email, when I sent the invites.  Now somehow it is my fault that she is getting the spam.  It started as a "hey man, did you do anything,' and is now at "how could you do this to me." 

It sucks getting spam and is embarrassing given the nature of the spam, but I don't really think it is my fault.  Heck, I know it isn't.  Blogger is owned by google.  I don't see them selling emails off.  Linked In is trying to promote a positive profesional image so I really doubt they would do this either.  Meredeth is adamant that these two places are the only places on the internet that have ever been exposed to her email address and that I am satan himself trying to ruin her life. 

It really pisses me off.  I don't know anyone that recieved and invitation to either site that was later spammed, not to mention months later.  She didn't even sign up. I did, and I didn't get spam.  The ignorance of the whole situation is infuriating.  Meredeth will sometimes read my blog, so feel free to let her know of any ways you think her email leaked into the hands of spammers.  Also list your own email.  I am compiling a list to sell.

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Snake Eyes Declassified

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on August 27, 2007 by Budd Black

Picked this up at the biblioteche this weekend and have already finished it.  It was a one sitting deal.  Excellent story.  I never read the comic growing up and fondly yet vaguely remember the cartoon.  I loved me some Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow though.  I liked Jinx too.  This book tells all about Snake Eye's history up until his first mission as a Joe. 

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QotD: If I Had Guaranteed Success…

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on August 27, 2007 by Budd Black

What would you attempt to do if you knew you could never fail? 
Submitted by BeckyPink

Natalie Portman. . . Oh wait, it says What and not who.  Score with Natalie Portman. 

Maybe that is too limiting.  I know.  Be the male Heidi Fleis.  The Hollywood Monsieur.  I would have the most famous female clients.  I would have standards though.  Lindsay, Paris, and Brittany would not be allowed.  Angelina, I would have to think about.  I don't want her giving birth to some foreign kid and saying that it is mine, but at the same time she was really hot in Hackers. 

Oh.  I would also invent a perpetual motion machine and perfect nuclear fusion. 

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